This past week I had the honor of speaking at my grandfather’s funeral in Talladega, Alabama. It was a humbling experience, to say the least. It was a sad occasion to see all my brothers, my mom and dad, cousins, 2nd cousins, great aunts, great uncles and all the family I haven’t seen in many years.
My grandfather’s name is Marvin Hubbard. To us grandkids he was always Big Daddy. Not Granddaddy, Pop, or Grandfather…but Big Daddy. Big Daddy died in the nursing home at the age of 89. He was married to his wife Eloise for 69 years in May of 2007. Holy cow! 69 years!! Can you even imagine? Wow.
Anyway, I learned a lot of things about Big Daddy this past week that I never knew before. Things that I wish I could have talked about with him. Things that I know had to be “milestones” in his life that truly defined his character. Things that, selfishly, I wanted to learn from and grow from. He was the head of the board of deacons in the 1st Baptist Church when they planted two churches in Talladega County in the 1950’s. Both of which are alive and thriving today. He owned an old country store on the town square in downtown Talladega from the 1940’s until he died this month. He turned the operation of his store over to his brothers in the early 70’s and went to work for the Alabama Schools for the Deaf and Blind as the salesman for the Southeastern region.
In listening to some of the stories that people shared at his funeral, I was amazed at the generosity of Big Daddy. Over and over again I heard “Mr. Hubbard gave my family food…” and “Mr. Hubbard bought us this…” and “Mr. Hubbard fixed this for us…” time and again. There is no doubt that from a business standpoint, Big Daddy gave away more than he sold. I really don’t think that he was “in the business” to make a profit. But he was a wealthy man. He did have some money, and live a rich life. My brothers and I were talking about what made my grandfather so special, not only to us, but to those he knew. When people saw my grandfather coming – they smiled! They knew that he would love and serve them no matter who they were. Big Daddy was the rare individual that assigned value to everyone he met.
When you met Big Daddy, he had charisma. He knew you, your family, your situation and needs. He smiled, and loved, and gave sincerely. When you talked with him, Big Daddy wanted to know about you. The conversation did not turn to him, it was about you. He had a way about him that made people comfortable and share their hurts. When Big Daddy left, you knew your situation was just a little bit better than it was before he got there. Amazing. He never took away, he always added with love.
One story I want to share is about the ledger. When cleaning out the store or his house, my great uncle found an old ledger filing system. My brother was given this old, rusty metal thing and was telling me about it. Inside this ledger, they found “tickets” that Big Daddy had written for folks as “IOUs” from years ago. Evidently, this ledger was used to track everything that people “owed” my grandfather. Evidently, it was also a “one-way” ticket. Big Daddy put them in, and never pulled them out again. What kind of business plan was this?
Now I may be drawing some conclusions here, but for those who knew Big Daddy I can see some heads nodding north and south on this one. Big Daddy was in the business of serving people, even if it came at a profit loss. Big Daddy was in the business to love people, even if he got nothing in return. Big Daddy was in the business to meet needs, not make money. As I said before, he was wealthy beyond measure. He was never financially “rich”. He was never a CEO of a major corporation, but he was my Big Daddy and a big daddy to countless in the state of Alabama and beyond.
It is a funny thing to think about these days. How radical and counter cultural is this type of life? Am I willing to give and expect nothing in return? Am I willing to love and expect nothing in return? Am I keeping a ledger to “balance the books” and make sure I “get what I am owed” or to demonstrate my generosity and caring to others for my grandchildren?
I wonder how many tickets in that ledger had my name on them.
Hugh, how wonderful. Don’t you hope you leave that kind of legacy for your own grandchildren. Personally, I think he had a bigger plan when he opened up God’s store.
This sounds like a man I would have liked to have known here on earth. What an example to emulate — someone who truly lived with the same ethics as Jesus. Thank you for introducing us to him. I think he’s a brother I’m going to have to look for when we all get to heaven.
Thanks for the beautiful tribute to your grandfather, Hugh! There are (and have been) people on this earth that have something that I hope for in my life - an ability and desire to show people the mind and heart of Christ. Your granddad, “Big Daddy”, was certainly one of those precious ones.
Hugh - when I was reading your tribute to Big Daddy, my thoughts took on my father. He owned a pharmacy and provided very well for his family. But at his funeral person after person gave testimony about he had cancelled their drug bills and helped them with their families. These are truly great men of God and we are privileged to have known them.